The ABCs of Automatic Referrals: L is for Listen

  Have you ever noticed that the best conversationalists are the people who let YOU do all the talking?  You know these folks. They ask you question after question and seem genuine interested in the answers. They pay attention.

These are the people most of us most like to be with, because they make us feel special and important. Well, your clients are no different, except perhaps that they are paying you, and therefore deserve your full attention even more than someone you just met at a cocktail party.

Advisors who listen well are more likely to have happy, satisfied clients—and that's the first step on the road to more referrals.

It's also important to remember that listening is a mission-critical skill in the Automatic Referrals process.  Remember that detective work is a big part of that process.  Give people a chance to talk, ask some simple probing follow-up questions, and you'll be amazed what you'll learn that can help lead you to great prospective referrals.

Here are a few tips to help you fine-tune your listening skills:

• Clear your mind. We all have a multitude of thoughts going through our heads at any given time. However, it is important that clients be given the full attention they deserve. Mentally put everything else aside. For the time you are together, your conscious self belongs to your client or prospect.
• Make eye contact. Show the client you want the business and have nothing else on your mind or agenda.
• Signal that you are listening and watch your cues. Don't let on that you have more important things to do. Checking your watch or pager implies your time is more valuable than your client's. Use affirming non-verbal cues such as smiling, nodding and attentively leaning forward.
• Be comfortable with silence. People often make their most revealing comments when you allow a silence to persist for a few seconds longer than might initially seem comfortable. Let YOUR client's words be the ones to ring in your ears RATHER THAN your own.
• Don't interrupt. Pause for three seconds after your client finishes a thought before responding. People speak at different speeds. Some speak slowly and others may stutter. Allow them to finish what they have to say.

Check out these additional resources (free registration required) about how to become a better listener.

Do You Really Listen to Your Clients?
Or do you merely wait to talk? There's more to listening than not talking—and prospects and clients can tell the difference.

How to Get Prospects Really Talking
If you want to motivate prospects to act, you've got to know how to appeal to their emotions—and that means asking four important questions.

Shut Up! 8 Reasons to Keep Quiet With Your Clients
People will pour out an astonishing amount of useful information if you just give them a chance. Try this technique during your next client meeting.